NOTHING is WRONG

tonight when i got off the subway at 42nd street, i was surprised to see a large area near the entrance roped off with that obnoxious pink tape. about a dozen police officers of various shapes and sizes guarded the edges and spoke suspiciously into their radios. i watched them warily as i passed by, but really thought nothing of it.

that is, until i reached the exit. here they had positioned not one, but two smiling police officers, poised to greet incoming passengers. their phrase of choice? "don't worry, everything is fine, nothing is wrong." repeated over, and over, and over again.

my first thought as a new york city resident was "oh man, something is DEFINITELY wrong. oh well, got to get home and balance my checkbook." *begin whistling as walking past the crime scene casually*

my first thought as a new york city tourist would have been "OH MY GOD ITS THE TERRORISTS!!! THEY'VE PLANTED A BOMB IN THE SUBWAY!! WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!!1" *flee from subway screaming and flailing arms uncontrollably*

honestly now, police officers. if there is one way to really freak people out, its to look as if you're trying to cover something up. if you're going to tell me something, i'll have the truth. and make mine a double.